As you get older, life certainly can become more complicated. The complexities of day to day living seem to grow exponentially. There’s your job, your family, your community, your government, your health, your family’s health, your finances, your hobbies/interests, your passions, your recreation and so on. These aspects of your life have been going on for some time now so why is it becoming more challenging to manage, and what is one to do to keep a healthy balance and a positive, upbeat outlook?

The problem is that the days seem to be so much shorter now than in one’s younger years. It’s hard to get everything done and to stay focused on priorities. Perhaps it’s the relationship of your years lived divided by your potential life span. When you were 10 years old (and with a potential life span of say 85 years) you were operating on a 12% factor … so remember how long those days were? Those summer vacations from school seemed to last an eternity. Now say you’re 55 years young … your same factor would be about 65%. That higher number means “where in the heck did the day go”? Yes, this is all very unscientific but I’m just trying to figure out why we’re always running out of time. Somehow the “perception” of time is impacted. Couple that with the fact that very few of us are truly able to live in the minute … we’re always thinking about what needs to be done or what has been done. Maybe, just maybe, this is how our elder population is able to endure the challenges of growing old. If we were experiencing the often difficult aging process with a child’s perception of time it could certainly be cruel and unusual treatment. Maybe this “time” distortion thing is a blessing … I think it is.

The folks we serve certainly help me with putting life’s priorities in order. I no longer complain about my knees aching from years of running … not when I see how many elders take life’s daily challenges on with such dignity and stoicism. Everyone does age differently. Attitude does seem to play a huge part in how one navigates the usual myriad of aging and health challenges. One person stands out in my mind and, if it were possible, I’d give him a posthumous award for aging with grace, dignity and pizzazz.

His name was Bob Morelli, and he was the father of one of my best friends going back as far as grade school. I watched this man with amazement as he exhibited tireless energy doing what he loved to do. First of all, he was a talker … an animated Italian from Brooklyn, New York. Sucessful in his own right, he raised two succesful boys who both ended up with careers in law. He was a piano/organ player extraordinaire. He fiddled with his ham radio and always seemed to be talking with people in far-off places. He was an avid tennis player and kept himself reasonably fit. Well into his seventies, he then thought it was time to start flying … so off he went to get his pilot’s license. Never a complainer, always upbeat, and with a great sense of humor, Mr. Morelli was a model for all of us to take note of … he found the time to enjoy life. Even after losing his beloved wife, he carried on. An avid reader, he never stopped learning.

So, this elder in particular was able to use the time-crunched later years very effectively, productively and happily. He met life head-on with robust enthusiasm. We did lose Bob a few years back but his memory lives on, and he truly had a powerful influence on everyone who ever met him. So go forward people and give it your best and jam pack those upcoming “short” days with an exciting zest for life … just like Mr. Morelli.

Tom Barton

Owner, Barton Home Care

Human aging continues to be one of life’s mysteries. Isn’t it amazing how people age differently? I’ve seen seventy year olds going on ninety and ninety year olds going on seventy. We know it’s a combination of many factors that affects human longevity and dictates how you fare during the aging process. Certainly your genes have a lot to do with it, your diet, exercise habits, environment and other factors can dictate whether you have any chance of becoming a centenarian. But we have all met people who don’t have the gene advantage, don’t necessarily eat well, never exercise yet seem to know the secret to human aging. What’s that all about? Could there be another factor that makes the difference?

Meet Sal, a 99 year old gentleman from New York City. Yes, he lost a leg to a vascular problem a few years back but, aside from that, he’s doing amazingly well for someone born in 1908. Think about the remarkable changes in the world that he has experienced! Radio, electricity, automobiles, airplanes, the flu epidemic, television, WWI, the depression, WWII, the Cold War, the space program, computers and on and on and on.

Sal lives with his daughter, who has her own career and life, and the decision was made that Sal could use some extra help. Enter in-home, non-medical companion care. We were privileged to be chosen to help this young man. Upon meeting Sal you would think he was somewhere in his eighties. A full head of hair, clarity of mind and oozing of personality this fellow deserved the best. Having experienced success in the financial world, Sal was used to the best.

We assigned our caregiver, Meredith, who like our other caregivers, thoroughly enjoys helping people. We thought the match would be a good one. Turns out, Sal thinks of Meredith as the “daughter that he always wanted” and Meredith simply adores Mr. Sal. Three days a week she spends time with Sal, listening to his classical music, fixing him his favorite meals, hearing his incredible stories and taking him on excursions. We hear stories of Sal singing and tapping his fingers on the dashboard as he and Meredith travel about. It’s truly hard to believe that in December of 2007, Mr. Sal will be 100 years young!

So, let’s not discount the impact that companionship can have on the human longevity and the aging process. We all need someone to tell our story to … we all need to know someone truly cares. We at Barton Home Care have absolutely no scientific evidence to support our claim but we’ve seen time and time again that a companion who cares can make all the difference in the world.

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Tom Barton

Owner, Barton Home Care