It seems that this retrospection and contemplation of the past is not unique to our father. It is part of a process called “Life Review,” a term coined over 50 years ago by Robert N. Butler, MD. It’s a rather universal course of elderly care and care for those who are terminally ill and can be manifested silently or orally, consciously or unconsciously. It is a personal process by which an individual assesses his or her life as it nears its conclusion. A variety of things can trigger this reflective process – midlife, the interest of family or friends, a turning point or career choice, or an impending death can all contribute to the process.

Butler describes life review as a normal developmental task of old age. Theoretically, it is experienced by all older adults, on a conscious or unconscious level. Unresolved conflicts are of particular importance in life review. They represent final opportunities for individuals to resolve and come to terms with life’s earlier conflicts.

Butler says that death can be accepted only through the resolution of those conflicts, atonement for past actions or inactions, and reconciliations with estranged family and friends. Life review helps people to make peace with the past. By recording one’s history, whether by the written or spoken word, a legacy can be provided to pass on to succeeding generations. The life review can be a natural healing process and important for elderly care in that it enables elders share their memories with empathic listeners and/or readers and it gives a sense of validation to their lives.

A number of life review and family history training manuals have been developed to help elders on their journey. The Hospice Foundation of America has a guide to help document memories called “A Guide for Recalling and Telling Your Life Story.” Using tools like this may help resolve conflicts and questions about the road or roads not taken.

Gerri Tyber, Operations Manger
Barton Home Care